Do you know what these are?

How about now?

Do they look like something to be put in a pie? (Say yes.)

I really, really hate waste. It’s one of my least favorite things ever. Levi likes to play this game with me where he says, “What if you had to choose between throwing out a full plate of (insert a delicious food here) or have someone give you $20?” And then he just ramps the price up until I finally agree to throw the hypothetical food away. It’s a really annoying game. The point is, it usually takes about $100 (depending on what the food is), where thereby proves my original point (that I hate waste).

Because I hate waste, I do weird things including but not limited to: saving rose petals from bouquets of flowers for making homemade rosewater, refilling shampoo bottles with dish detergent and olive jars with castile soap (much to my household’s confusion), making green tomato pie.

That’s what those are, if you hadn’t guessed yet. Well, tomato season was over, and there were a few cupfuls of tomatoes lingering on the vine that certainly weren’t going to turn red. What was a resourceful girl to do?

Luckily Ken Haedrich provides not one, but TWO recipes for Green Tomato Pie in his cookbook. I’m not the only crazy one around here.

Alright, now that you’ve gotten over your initial shock…doesn’t the filling actually look pretty in the bowl, with the contrasting green tomatoes and red cranberries?

Oh yeah, and I used bear lard in the crust. I guess that could also be classified as one of those weird/resourceful hunter/gatherer things I do.

But before I had the chance to bake this pie, there was a slight mishap in which Obi ate three-quarters of a dark chocolate bar and I had to rush him to the animal hospital instead of watching football and eating pie like I was kinda planning on. The Giants lost that game anyway. It figures.

When Obi had finished running into walls (apparently how he exhibits “chocolate toxicity”) and gobbling down his white rice and bland chicken breast, I baked the pie and then took great pleasure in feeding it to various friends and making them guess what they were eating. And hey! They liked it.

Kind of makes me want to start quoting Dr. Seuss…

“Say! I like green tomatoes and crans! I do! I like them, Jess-I-am!”